3D Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstasy [ Movie Review ] ★★

After the election is over, Golden Village Pictures finally released the dates for 3D Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstasy. Singaporean, mark your calender down. On 21st July 2011, we can finally unleash our desires for the big screen version of this highly anticipated 3D soft porn film that features the likes of Japanese Adult Video stars like Saori Hara (who had suddenly retired from showbiz after the recent tsunami) and sexy Hong Kong actress Vonnie Liu.

According to Channelnewsasia, we will be getting the International version with no cuts and obviously this 3D soft porn will be getting the R21 rating. International version will be 102 mins long while the version shown in Hong Kong was 129 mins long. There will also be another longer version of this movie that will be released on the Director cut DVD eventually.

The Pitch

Sex sells and Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstasy sold like hotcakes in Hong Kong when it was first released. There were even reports of tour groups for the poor China folks (who won't be getting this movie in the mainland) to watch this movie in Hong Kong. Elsewhere, major media like Reuters are featuring news on Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstasy as the world's first IMAX-3D erotic film (not Asian first 3D erotic film, that honors would go to the Korean's movie Natalie) and Hoyts cinema in New Zealand and Australia were showing it in full IMAX glory (but not in Singapore IMAX tsk tsk tsk).

But of course the perks of getting this movie way later than Hong Kong, Australia and New Zealand would be that we would be more informed about the movie through reviews and the words had not be kind. Ranging from your average movie goers who posted one liner in forums to this extremely crude and funny Hong Kong review (read by Chapman To)(with English translation), it's pretty easy to get the general feel of the folks who had watched this movie. Bottom line, it's bad.

It's so bad that people are going all out to tell one another to avoid watching this soft porn flick. But called it good advertising or curiosity, I for one would like to see bad this movie can get and why it caused CNNGO's Zoe Li to decide on never to have sex again because its (Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstasy) message of "true love doesn't need sex" was so convincing.

Yes, sometimes we head into bad movies so that we could see the wreckage with our own eyes. Or perhaps I am just simply sadomasochist. anyway let's head on to ...

The Plot


Wei Yangshen (Hiro Hayama) was a scholar who believed in pursuing the ultimate pleasures in life and had no inclination to settle down so soon. Things changed when he accompanied a friend to a matchmaking session. After meeting his friend's potential bride Tie Yuxiang (Leni Lan), the daughter of a well-off family, he quickly changed his tune as both of them fell in love at first sight. They got married quickly but their bedroom activities weren't that enjoyable as Wei Yangshen couldn't control his ejaculation and later on, we discovered that he wasn't really well-endowed down below.

To make matter worse, Wei Yangshen started to "investigate" Prince Ning (Tony Ho)'s crime by visiting the Tower of the Rarities. He became bewitched by the ladies in Prince Ning's Pavilion of Ultimate Bliss, especially Prince Ning's prized girls Reizhu (Saori Hara) and Dongmei (Yukiko Suo). Reizhu helped Wei Yangshen to overcome his premature ejaculation problem and finally our hero could finally enjoy sex.

Wei Yangshen became obsessed with having sex in Prince Ning's pleasure dorm that he neglected his wife. It became so bad that the Tie family force Wei Yangshen to agree to a divorce. After the divorce, Wei Yangshen returned back to Prince Ning's lair and helped him to discover another treasure in his vast collection. As a reward, Prince Ning allowed him to have sex with Dongmei but his micro-penis couldn't satisfied Dongmei and that gave him an inferior complex.

Meanwhile in the Tie's household, Yuxiang started to have sexual urges and lust after a coolie. 

To overcome his micro penis problem, Wei Yangshen seeked Elder Bliss (Vonnie Lui) help and he underwent an unorthodox penis transplant. With his newly acquired penis, Wei Yangshen is now able to satisfy many women.  What he didn't know was that this is all part of Prince Ning's evil plan.

The Perspective

Sex and Zen Extreme Ecstasy turned out to be as bad as what the detractors are saying. Personally, it wasn't the violent and gore that turned me off. It's a weird norm that most of Hong Kong erotic Category III infuse gory stuff into their sex scenes so it came as no surprise. I am not really a fan of Leni Lan and Vonnie Lui so there were no expectation on them to give an arousing performance. Saori Hara and Yukiko Suo are two Japan Adult Video actress who had done plenty of hardcore porn so there very little anticipation for them to top their arousing act in a softporn flick.

Putting those letdowns aside, my personal displeasure with Sex and Zen Extreme Ecstasy would have to be the plotting and characterization.

Before you question the sanity of reviewing a Hong Kong Category III (3) soft porn flick, I am comparing Sex and Zen Extreme Ecstasy with Amy Yip's Sex and Zen 玉蒲團之偷情寶鑑 (which was equally notorious back in the nineties ) and the recent The Forbidden Legend: Sex and Chopsticks 金瓶梅 (Jin Ping Mei). All three titles had similar structure but the execution differs greatly.

Basically, Sex and Zen Extreme Ecstasy is some sort of reboot of Amy Yip's Sex and Zen. The story flows better in Sex and Zen and they don't do U-turn on characterization. In Sex and Zen Extreme Ecstasy, it's like a marathon of sexual episodes with little effort on their linkage. They also tried to do too much with one movie. Sex and Chopsticks was at least wise enough to split the movie into two so that the changes that happens to the protagonist(s) could happen slowly. Here we get a crammed session of changes to the main characters that would make you roll your eyes. Personally it's hard to imagine why would anyone be affected by the morale of the story because the execution was really bad.

If there's anything that Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstasy had done well, it would be to utilize the "freshness" of recent 3D Fads. It's a great marketing success but I believe it's going to be hard to repeat this kind of success again. Folks might be attracted to the gimmicky pitch that shroud this film production at first but after an unsatisfying time, they might not come back for seconds. But then again, curiosity might just do the trick for them.

3D Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstasy [ Trailer ]

Safe For Work Trailers

Singapore trailer


China trailer - provides more unseen footage from the previous trailer and showcase more of the potential 3D effects with various projectile


Another Trailer ... that comes with mosaic to cover up the notti bits. But from this trailer, you can get a rough idea what to expect from the Movie

3D Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstasy [ Video ]

Press Conference with the Actress (Vonnie Lui, Saori Hara & Yukiko Suo)


A Look at Behind the Scenes cum Making Off



Just wondering if anyone need translation? I can try and write out the gist of what they are saying. Just let me know by posting a comment on this post. Cheers RLJ

Treasure Inn | 財神客棧 [ Movie Review] ★★★

Short Takes

Director Wong Jing is back with another China production. Thankfully Treasure Inn was much better than his last theatrical movie Future X-Cops. Even though it's still catered to the China market (i.e blatant  usage of China actors and some obvious hold back in crude humour), Treasure Inn is a film that easy to sit through.

Treasure Inn follows two low ranking constables who were investigating massacre at the city's richest man. Following the trail of the stolen life size white jade of the "Goddess of Mercy", they encountered a pair of twin sisters known as the "Reward Money Hunters". Pooling their resources together for the reward money for recovering the white jade, they head towards the infamous Treasure Inn where all the precious stolen goods get auction there. 

The spoofs on Tsui Hark's upcoming 3D The Flying Swords of Dragon Gate (or the 90s version of New Dragon Gate Inn) and Stephen Chow's Kungfu Hustle were pretty obvious. Although these spoofs were not very inventive, they were still entertaining to spot. These spoofs and the comedic elements in this was a mixed bag. Some where laugh out funny and some just totally missed the spot.

Nicholas Tse who is currently dodging the media for the latest news on his marriage breakup was pretty effective as a eye candy. Compare to his recent movies, there nothing here to stretch his acting range and to some, that's a good thing. Bland but pleasant.

Likewise for Charlene Choi as the irritating Water Dragon Girl who is smitten by Nicholas Tse's character and is constantly worried that he would abandon her for the lady owner of the Treasure Inn. I wonder how long can she keep up in such fluffy flower vase roles.

Nick Cheung stole the show with funny one liners and comedic showmanship. He hasn't been this funny for a long time. Partly due to his choice in making serious movie these recent years. Or perhaps it's the partnership with  Wong Jing that Nick Cheung was so funny in this one. If their collaboration could result in such consistent standard, Nick Cheung should forget the dramatic roles that gives him film awards nomination and crave out a career that cement on comedy. 

Bottom line for Treasure Inn is that while it's not that good that you have to shell out movie ticket money to catch it in the cinema, it's won't be that bad if you did it anyway.

The Lost Bladesman | 關雲長 [ Movie Review ] ★★★

The Pitch

Donnie Yen as Guan Yu? Can he pull it off? We have idealized Guan Yu as a 7ft tall man with long beard and red face. Donnie Yen is not exactly the tall guy that people would immediately think of when there's any casting rumor for the role of Guan Yu.

But since Donnie Yen is currently the hot property in the Hong Kong / China martial arts film industry, he is obviously the go to guy if you want to sell a martial arts film. Nevertheless he has also shown us that he could carry a dignified aura when he portrayal Ip Man in recent years so the height difference might not matter that much.

It would be interesting to see if his portrayal of Guan Yu could help boost his career in the same way as Ip Man had done previously.

Beside that, he had also roped in directors Alan Mak and Felix Chong (co directors for Lady Cop and Papa Crook & Overheard) and Jiang Wen (Let the Bullets Fly) into this movie about Guan Yu's uneasy friendship with Cao Cao and how he crossed five passes while slaying six Generals. This story arc of Luo Guanzhong's historical novel Romance of the Three Kingdoms that focus on these two iconic characters had not been adapted for the big screen before and it's likely to draw the fans of epic historical battle of China in.

The Plot

During the warring period of Han Dynasty, Cao Cao (Jiang Wen) had attacked his rival warlord Liu Bei (Alex Fong) and managed to capture Liu Bei's family members. Liu Bei managed to flee while his sworn brother Guan Yu (Donnie Yen) remained under Cao Cao's command. Guan Yu was a formidable warrior and Cao Cao tried to enlist his aid by showering him with gifts and honorary title. However Guan Yu was a loyal friend of Cao Cao's enemy Liu Bei and he rejected Cao Cao's offer.

As Cao Cao tried to sway Guan Yu over to his side, he discovered that Guan Yu is secretly in love with his sworn brother's concubine Qilan (Betty Sun). In a last bid to buy Guan Yu's loyalty, Cao Cao sent Liu Bei's family members back and attempted to trick Guan Yu to show his love to Qilan with aphrodisiac wine. However Guan Yu managed to stay rational and stopped himself from taking advantage of Qilan.

A messenger arrived to inform Guan Yu on Liu Bei's whereabouts and after knowing where his sworn brother was located, he left Cao Cao's camp with Qilan. Cao Cao was unable to stop Guan Yu and due to a previous agreement, gave orders to his generals to give Guan Yu a safe passage through his territory. His generals on the other hand felt that it's a mistake to release Guan Yu back to the rival camp, so they plot to kill Guan Yu as he embarks on the journey back to Liu Bei.


The Perspective

Not being well versed in Romance of the Three Kingdoms, The Last Bladesman was rather tedious and bewildering. There were plenty of things that were left unexplained or shown and being a first timer to this story arc of Romance of the Three Kingdoms, it was difficult to stay afloat with the sequence of things that happened. Let's just say that I had to Wikipedia after the show to get a better idea on what happened.

The significant of Guan Yu "Crossing Fives Passes and Slaying Six Generals" didn't translate well in this adaption. It felt like an excuse to showcase one fight sequence after another. The Wikipedia page on this segment also revealed that The Lost Bladesman had diluted the original tale so that they could fit in the unconvincing love angle between Guan Yu and Qilan. It would have been preferable if they had stick closer to the source material and abandon Qilan as love interest.

Otherwise, it was a relatively entertaining film to introduce newbies to this story arc of Romance of the Three Kingdoms. Donnie Yen was adequate as the legendary Guan Yu but it was Jiang Wen who had stole the show with his rendition of Cao Cao. It might be an unfair comparison as Cao Cao definitely had more intriguing materials to play with. Not exactly a must watch but it wouldn't hurt to catch it.

Water For Elephants [ Movie Review ] ★★★★

The Pitch

How to be remembered after the Twilight Franchise ends? Or does Robert Pattinson has a career beyond the realm of Twilight? Let's just say that not many people have caught his last two non-Twilight flicks "How to be" and "Remember Me". These days, it's hard to rely on good looks and fan base to establish a acting career in Hollywood.

Water for Elephants might just be the break for him. Based on Sara Gruen's novel that was on New York Times Best Seller list for 12 weeks, the tale about a man running away with the circus might just be the one that gives him a chance to convince the non-Twilight fans of his appeal and charisma beyond the sullen Cullen persona.

Besides that, Robert Pattinson is getting support from two Oscar winners. Christoph Waltz made his mark with his memorable portrayal of SS Colonel Hans Landa in Inglourious Basterds, will be menacing the adulterous couple as the circus ringmaster. Reese Witherspoon who did a fantastic rendition of June Carter in Walk The Line will be circus star performer and the unwitting love interest in a complicated love triangle.


The Plot

Jacob Jankowski (Robert Pattinson) a young veterinary school student suffers a major blow in his life during the final paper. His parents passed away in an automobile accident and the bank was taking back all the property that his parents had mortgaged for his school fees. Lost and devastated with the chain of events, he wandered about on a train track and came across a traveling circus.

Since he is a veterinary student who almost completed his  degree, he was taken in by the charismatic but brutal ring master August (Christoph Waltz). Jacob soon form an uneasy relationship with August and his wife Marlena (Reese Witherspoon), the a performer of the circus who works with animals.

As Jacob and Marlena works together with Rosie the elephant (a recent acquirement by August) to form a new star attraction for the circus, they started to grow fond of each other. August grew suspicious of their relationship and confronted them with threats and physical abuse. Could these two lovebirds escapes the ringmaster crutches and set off to find a better life elsewhere?

The Perspective

Water for Elephant turned out to be surprisingly good. First and foremost, this movie managed to capture the pure escapism of running away with a circus. It also did well to convey the sense of old school grandeur that only a circus could provide. It provided reminders on why the circus is such a place of wonderment and danger that mesmerized us.

Besides the glam and glitz of the circus act, it also dealt with animal abuse issues that plague the circus group for a long time. How are the animals treated in circus and what do they do to make them perform. The case here would be Rosie, the elephant that could not be trained. What do you do when that happened? Getting Rosie was a considerate sum of investment and the circus workers need to make a living. Water for Elephant gave an interesting perspective to both sides .

The cast were fabulous in their respective roles. Hal Holbrook short performance as the old Jacob who was narrating this story was a strong anchor to start and end the movie. Christoph Waltz shined again as a morally conflicted villain who was effortlessly charming but yet with a menacing edge. This is one performance that makes you forget the lame Green Hornet villain that he did recently.

Robert Pattinson and Reese Witherspoon would be one of the most badly mismatched couple on screen in recent years. They both gave a great performance but when they appeared on screen together as a couple, the chemistry between them are just not there. It's easy to believe Jacob's lovelorn feelings for Marlena and Marlena's conflicted emotions but when they come together, they simply don't look like a couple in love.

There are also some rather apparent loopholes in this movie. The biggest one would be why did Jacob went on a journey after his parents passed away. Even though he became homeless, it's likely that his school fees had been paid in full and he was just one exam away from being a certified vet. Why would he abandon his last chance of making a living, especially during the Great Depression period?

Nevertheless, it's easy to forget those glaring loopholes and get swept away by the chain of events that occurred in Water for Elephants. It brought back some of the old magical charms of circus life and the love triangle between the three main characters were well handled. Robert Pattinson and Reese Witherspoon might be the mismatched screen couple of the year but lucky that bit could be easily overlooked. Water for Elephants come highly recommended.